Posts Tagged ‘Management’

Gurbani and Human Resources Development

Structured management practices in various types of organizations are a comparatively recent development. However the concepts are not new. They are based on common sense and have always been practiced. Sri Guru Granth Sahib (Gurbani) the Sikh scripture teaches a practical spiritual life. It broadly covers management aspects in the modern context in such a manner as to integrate them into the human conduct. The aim is to enable man (and woman) to live a fruitful and productive life, as also to face real-life situations. Many of these aspects are taught through metaphors pointing to an amazing cohesion between the mundane and the spiritual. Since spirituality is a life lived naturally, these common sense concepts automatically fit into such a life.

Needless to say Gurbani deals with the subject in a general way and not for specific jobs.

An organization needs three types of resources namely men (used generically and includes women), money and machines. Manpower is a valuable resource as much for its own contribution as for management of the other two. Management of this resource was earlier called man-management but was enlarged to include development of skills. It is now called Human Resources Development (HRD) which aims at continuing improvement of manpower skills for the benefit of both the individuals and the concerned organization.

HRD covers the aspects of Evaluation, Training, and Application of the acquired skills to actual work. Good interpersonal relations which are important both in spiritual and temporal life are stressed. These help to promote team work and cohesion in an organization. All these are covered in Gurbani.

Evaluation

We start with the process of evaluation. Evaluation is the process of determining suitably of a worker for a given job. This is done by or on behalf of the employer for selection of new candidates or existing employees. It is desirable that it is first done by an aspirant himself to see if he fits the requirements for the job he plans to apply for.

Evaluation by the Employer.

Evaluation by the employer is important because if people are employed without proper evaluation the desired results are not likely to be achieved: ਹੋਇਇਆਣਾਕਰੇਕੰਮੁਆਣਿਸਕੈਰਾਸਿਜੇਇਕਅਧਚੰਗੀਕਰੇਦੂਜੀਭੀਵੇਰਾਸਿ੪੭੪An untrained person cannot do a job well; he may do one thing right but will spoil another (SGGS, p 474).

An aspirant usually submits a resume of his qualifications and experience with his application. The prospective employer then tests and/or interviews him to check his suitability:

ਨਾਨਕ ਬਦਰਾ ਮਾਲ ਕਾ ਭੀਤਰਿ ਧਰਿਆ ਆਣਿ ਖੋਟੇ ਖਰੇ ਪਰਖੀਅਨਿ ਸਾਹਿਬ ਕੈ ਦੀਬਾਣਿ ੧੭੮੯

The candidate presents claims of his capabilities; the strengths and weaknesses are then examined by the employer (M: 1, SGGS, p 789).

The antecedents are examined against laid down standards with due consideration because the organization needs people:

ਕਸਿ ਕਸਵਟੀ ਲਾਈਐ ਪਰਖੇ ਹਿਤੁ ਚਿਤੁ ਲਾਇ ਖੋਟੇ ਠਉਰ ਨ ਪਾਇਨੀ ਖਰੇ ਖਜਾਨੈ ਪਾਇ ੧੫੭

Evaluation is done against laid down yardsticks and due consideration; those who meet the requirements are accepted; those found unqualified are rejected (M: 1, SGGS, p 57).

It is not uncommon to find candidates overstating their capabilities. Honesty of purpose is thus important. It may also happen that a candidate does not understand the requirements for the job. There is therefore need for proper self-evaluation before one makes any claims.

Self Evaluation.

No one knows, or should know, a person better than himself; hence judging oneself should be an easy task. But a real judge is one who judges dispassionately. So ambitions and other prejudices should not be allowed to influence self-appraisal.

Self evaluation is important not just for applying for a job. It is also important in situations like wanting a position any where or aspiring say for membership of a sports team, or at work. If this evaluation is carried out objectively, both strengths and weaknesses come to light. One can then address the weaknesses in order to improve. One who objectively carries out self-evaluation knows the weaknesses as also what to do about them:

ਨਾਨਕ ਪਰਖੇ ਆਪ ਕਉ ਤਾ ਪਾਰਖੁ ਜਾਣੁ ਰੋਗੁ ਦਾਰੂ ਦੋਵੈਬੁਝੈ ਤਾ ਵੈਦੁ ਸੁਜਾਣੁ ੨੧੪੮

A good appraiser is one who evaluates the self; like a good doctor he understands the weaknesses and their remedies (M: 2, SGGS, p 148).

ਪ੍ਰਣਵਤਿ ਨਾਨਕ ਗਿਆਨੀ ਕੈਸਾ ਹੋਇ ਆਪੁ ਪਛਾਣੈ ਬੂਝੈ ਸੋਇ ਗੁਰ ਪਰਸਾਦਿ ਕਰੇ ਬੀਚਾਰੁ ਸੋ ਗਿਆਨੀ ਦਰਗਹ ਪਰਵਾਣੁ ੩੦੧੨੫

Who is wise? One who knows and understand the self. If he contemplates on the training he has received; he will be successful (M: 1, SGGS, p 25).

However human beings generally like to concentrate on highlighting their strengths and ignore the weaknesses.

ਸਭੁ ਕੋ ਆਖੈ ਬਹੁਤੁ ਬਹੁਤੁ ਘਟਿ ਨ ਆਖੈ ਕੋਇ ਕੀਮਤਿ ਕਿਨੈ ਨ ਪਾਈਆ ਕਹਣਿ ਨ ਵਡਾ ਹੋਇ 115

Every one tries to show how big or virtuous he is; no one talks of one’s own shortcomings; people do not evaluate themselves but no one can become big only by saying so (M: 1, SGGS, p 15).

On the other hand it is also possible that a person has potential but is not aware of it. Gurbani uses the metaphor of Divine presence in man to highlight this point. Since he is not fully wakened to it he cannot express it. He can however be helped by the Guru. Similarly a man’s capabilities can be detected by an expert. There are numerous examples of talent being spotted by experts in the fields of sport, acting and arts to name a few. The third Guru says:

ਅੰਨ੍ਹ੍ਹੇ ਵਸਿ ਮਾਣਕੁ ਪਇਆ ਘਰਿ ਘਰਿ ਵੇਚਣ ਜਾਇ ਓਨਾ ਪਰਖ ਨ ਆਵਈ ਅਢੁ ਨ ਪਲੈ ਪਾਇ ਜੇ ਆਪਿ ਪਰਖ ਨ ਆਵਈ ਤਾਂ ਪਾਰਖੀਆ ਥਾਵਹੁ ਲਇਓ‍ੁ ਪਰਖਾਇ ੩੧੨੪੯

An ignorant person having a jewel (of talent) tries to sell (tell others about it); this is not recognized by them as its value is not realized. Hence if one cannot evaluate the self he should get that done by an appraiser i.e. expert or guru (M: 3, SGGS, p 1249).

As mentioned above man rarely recognizes or owns up his own shortcomings but they are ultimately revealed. The Guru points these out along with the pitfalls they may cause. Once a man knows them and takes remedial action he is more confident:

ਗੁਰਿ ਦਿਖਲਾਈ ਮੋਰੀ ਜਿਤੁ ਮਿਰਗ ਪੜਤ ਹੈ ਚੋਰੀ ਮੂੰਦਿ ਲੀਏ ਦਰਵਾਜੇ ਬਾਜੀਅਲੇ ਅਨਹਦ ਬਾਜੇ ਕ੬੫੬

The guru points out shortcomings and their adverse effects; once the loopholes are plugged there is peace and happiness (Kabir, SGGS, p 656).

It is important that such advice is received with an open mind and acted upon. If a person who does not learn, but still claims to know every thing, is unwise. Guru Nanak cautions:

ਮਨਹੁ ਜਿ ਅੰਧੇ ਕੂਪ ਕਹਿਆ ਬਿਰਦੁ ਨ ਜਾਣਨ੍ਹ੍ਹੀ ਮਨਿ ਅੰਧੈ ਊਂਧੈ ਕਵਲਿ ਦਿਸਨ੍ਹ੍ਹਿ ਖਰੇ ਕਰੂਪ ਇਕ ਕਹਿ ਜਾਣਹਿ ਕਹਿਆ ਬੁਝਹਿ ਤੇ ਨਰ ਸੁਘੜ ਸਰੂਪ ਇਕਨਾ ਨਾਦ ਨ ਬੇਦ ਨ ਗੀਅ ਰਸੁ ਰਸ ਕਸ ਨ ਜਾਣੰਤਿ ਇਕਨਾ ਸੁਧਿ ਨ ਬੁਧਿ ਨ ਅਕਲਿ ਸਰ ਅਖਰ ਕਾ ਭੇਉ ਨ ਲਹੰਤਿ ਨਾਨਕ ਸੇ ਨਰ ਅਸਲਿ ਖਰ ਜਿ ਬਿਨੁ ਗੁਣ ਗਰਬੁ ਕਰੰਤਿ ੧੨੪੬Those who have closed minds do not learn even when told;they remain ignorant, their mind withers and people do not like them. Conversely those who can express themselves and also listen, are wise and likeable. Some have no talent be it music, scriptures, poetry or to know good from bad; some are not conscious of themselves, are not wise nor are they educated.Such people who have no virtue but still display vanity are real asses (M: 1, SGGS, p 1246).

The importance of self-evaluation cannot therefore be overemphasized

The Learning Process.

All organizations aim at having a productive work force. This is achieved by developing skills that contribute towards meeting organizational goals. For this purpose on-the-job or external training programs are organized. Training aims at developing the professional skills appropriate for the job and integration of individuals into the team.

At times people do things which they like but may that may not be relevant for achievement of the organization’s goals. This results in waste of time and effort. Training should bring out that things that are not relevant or do nor provide synergy should be done away with:

ਫਰੀਦਾ ਜਿਨ੍ਹ੍ਹੀਕੰਮੀਨਾਹਿਗੁਣਤੇਕੰਮੜੇਵਿਸਾਰਿਮਤੁਸਰਮਿੰਦਾਥੀਵਹੀਸਾਂਈਦੈਦਰਬਾਰਿ੫੯੧੩੮੧

Things that are not useful should be given up;so that one does not cut a sorry figure before the boss (Farid, SGGS, p 1381).

Properly planned training helps to focus on the work that contributes to productivity. An untrained person keeps going through the process of trial and error resulting in waste of resources. This is like aimless wandering wilderness not knowing which way to go:

ਗਿਆਨ ਅੰਜਨੁ ਜਾ ਕੀ ਨੇਤ੍ਰੀ ਪੜਿਆ ਤਾ ਕਉ ਸਰਬ ਪ੍ਰਗਾਸਾ ਅਗਿਆਨਿ ਅੰਧੇਰੈ ਸੂਝਸਿ ਨਾਹੀ ਬਹੁੜਿ ਬਹੁੜਿ ਭਰਮਾਤਾ ੫੬੧੦Remaining ignorant and still trying to do things is like wandering in the dark; but with learning the mind is enlightened and the path becomes visible (M: 5, SGGS, p 610).

A trainee should pay attention and show respect to the instructor who shows the way. This is also applicable in spiritual pursuit wherein one must follow and show respect to the Guru:

ਬਾਰਿ ਜਾਉ ਗੁਰ ਅਪੁਨੇ ਊਪਰਿ ਜਿਨਿ ਹਰਿ ਹਰਿ ਨਾਮੁ ਦ੍ਰਿੜ੍ਹ੍ਹਾਯਾ ਮਹਾ ਉਦਿਆਨ ਅੰਧਕਾਰ ਮਹਿ ਜਿਨਿ ਸੀਧਾ ਮਾਰਗੁ ਦਿਖਾਯਾ ੫੬੭੨

Let us submit to the Guru (teacher) who creates firm belief in Naam (God’s virtues, the objective); he shows the way in the dark jungle of ignorance (M: 5, SGGS, p 672).

For training to be fruitful a trainee must accept what the teacher imparts, and doubts if any have been cleared. A trainee who has some prefixed ideas and continues with them will not benefit from the training. Gurbani explains this using the metaphor of irrigation of agricultural land. Irrigation water will not reach the mounds if there are any in the fields. If the land is irrigated by rain the water will simply flow off. Crops sowed there will not be profitable. Similarly learning requires submission:ਗਰਬੁ ਜਿਨ੍ਹਾ ਵਡਿਆਈਆ ਧਨਿ ਜੋਬਨਿ ਆਗਾਹ ਖਾਲੀ ਚਲੇ ਧਣੀ ਸਿਉ ਟਿਬੇ ਜਿਉ ਮੀਹਾਹੁ ੧੦੫ ਫ੧੩੮੩

Those who pride themselves with great capabilities, wealth or physical strength, (and do not care to learn) go empty handed the way mounds are not irrigated by rain: 105: (Farid, SGGS, p 1383).

A person who goes his own way despite being instructed is like a stone. It water does not seep into it:

ਮਨਮੁਖ ਪਥਰੁ ਸੈਲੁ ਹੈ ਧ੍ਰਿਗੁ ਜੀਵਣੁ ਫੀਕਾ ਜਲ ਮਹਿ ਕੇਤਾ ਰਾਖੀਐ ਅਭ ਅੰਤਰਿ ਸੂਕਾ ੧੪੧੯

A self oriented man is like a stone; his life is insipid and cursed; he is not imbibe good things the way a stone’s inside remains dry even in water (M: 1, SGGS, p 419).

To be successful training given by the instructor must be assimilated and brought into practice:

ਸਿਖੀ ਸਿਖਿਆ ਗੁਰ ਵੀਚਾਰਿ ਨਦਰੀ ਕਰਮਿ ਲਘਾਏ ਪਾਰਿ ੧੪੬੫

Reflect on the training given by the instructor; this contributes to success (M: 1, SGGS, p 465).

Putting Training to Use.

Knowledge gained from training should be put to use otherwise time, effort and money spent on it is wasted. It not only hurts the person but also the organization. The state of those who receive training but do not use it is illustrated by the following two examples. The first is one of not caring what has been learnt:

ਕਬੀਰ ਮਨੁ ਜਾਨੈ ਸਭ ਬਾਤ ਜਾਨਤ ਹੀ ਅਉਗਨੁ ਕਰੈ ਕਾਹੇ ਕੀ ਕੁਸਲਾਤ ਹਾਥਿਦੀਪੁ ਕੂਏ ਪਰੈ ੨੧੬ ਕ ੧੩੭੬

If a man knows every thing but despite knowing does wrong, this is like a man walking with light in hand falling into a ditch: 216: (Kabir, SGGS, p 1376)

In the second case a person takes training for a skill knowing fully well that he will not pursue it. It is like asking the address some one he never wants to see. Similarly in the spiritual field it is like someone asking how to find God when he is not interested in it:

ਰਾਹੁ ਦਸਾਈ ਨ ਜੁਲਾਂ ਆਖਾਂ ਅੰਮੜੀਆਸੁ ਤੈ ਸਹ ਨਾਲਿ ਅਕੂਅਣਾ ਕਿਉ ਥੀਵੈ ਘਰ ਵਾਸੁ ੧੫੫੭

I ask the way, do not move but say I have reached there; O Lord how can I enter Your abode when I want to have nothing to do with You ? (M: 1, SGGS, p 557).

Employment.

When one takes a job it should be kept in mind that, at work, personal prferences are to be subordinated and the supremacy of the employer accepted. If this is followed the employee is liked by the boss and also rewarded financially, if not he suffers:

ਚਾਕਰੁ ਲਗੈ ਚਾਕਰੀ ਜੇ ਚਲੈ ਖਸਮੈ ਭਾਇ ਹੁਰਮਤਿ ਤਿਸ ਨੋ ਅਗਲੀ ਓਹੁ ਵਜਹੁ ਭਿ ਦੂਣਾ ਖਾਇ

ਖਸਮੈ ਕਰੇ ਬਰਾਬਰੀ ਫਿਰਿ ਗੈਰਤਿ ਅੰਦਰਿ ਪਾਇ

ਵਜਹੁ ਗਵਾਏ ਅਗਲਾ ਮੁਹੇ ਮੁਹਿ ਪਾਣਾ ਖਾਇ

ਜਿਸ ਦਾ ਦਿਤਾ ਖਾਵਣਾ ਤਿਸੁ ਕਹੀਐ ਸਾਬਾਸਿ

ਨਾਨਕ ਹੁਕਮੁ ਨ ਚਲਈ ਨਾਲਿ ਖਸਮ ਚਲੈ ਅਰਦਾਸਿ ੨੨ ੨ ੪੭੪

If an employee works according to the employer’s directions,

he receives recognition and better compensation;

if he shows arrogance and acts equal to the boss he will be sorry;

he will lose compensation and be punished.

One who provides the source of livelihood should be acknowledged (M: 1, SGGS, p 474).

If an employee indulges in arguments, he is disliked by the boss. On the other hand humility earns respect:ਚਾਕਰੁ ਲਗੈ ਚਾਕਰੀ ਨਾਲੇ ਗਾਰਬੁ ਵਾਦੁ ਗਲਾ ਕਰੇ ਘਣੇਰੀਆ ਖਸਮ ਨ ਪਾਏ ਸਾਦੁ ਆਪੁ ਗਵਾਇ ਸੇਵਾ ਕਰੇ ਤਾ ਕਿਛੁ ਪਾਏ ਮਾਨੁ ਨਾਨਕ ਜਿਸ ਨੋ ਲਗਾ ਤਿਸੁ ਮਿਲੈਲਗਾ ਸੋ ਪਰਵਾਨੁ ੨੪੭੪

If a person takes employment but is arrogant and argumentative;

he may try to impress by talk but will not be liked by the employer;

If he gives up ego and works he will be respected;

This is the way to be acceptable (M: 2, SGGS, p 474).

If an employee does things the way he likes he will have no satisfaction and will also be afraid of being disciplined. On the other hand if he sheds ego and accepts the organizational goals as his own he will have no fear. He then works sincerely as part of the team. The second Guru says:

ਏਹਕਿਨੇਹੀਚਾਕਰੀਜਿਤੁਭਉਖਸਮਜਾਇ

ਨਾਨਕਸੇਵਕੁਕਾਢੀਐਜਿਸੇਤੀਖਸਮਸਮਾਇ 2 475

Why take a job in which one works in fear;

a good employee is one whose aims merge with those of the boss (M: 2, SGGS, p 475).

The desirable scenario in service is this:

ਵਿਚਿ ਦੁਨੀਆ ਸੇਵ ਕਮਾਈਐ ਤਾ ਦਰਗਹ ਬੈਸਣੁ ਪਾਈਐ

ਕਹੁ ਨਾਨਕ ਬਾਹ ਲੁਡਾਈਐ ੩੩੧੨੬

One who works sincerely at the job obtains regard of the employer;

is happy and waves his hands in joy (M: 1, SGGS, p 26).

Conferencesand Discussions.The following aspects are important in inter-personal relations and discussions:

ਜਬਲਗੁਦੁਨੀਆਰਹੀਐਨਾਨਕਕਿਛੁਸੁਣੀਐਕਿਛੁਕਹੀਐ੧੬੬੧In a discussion first listen and then talk (SGGS, p 661).

Any one participating in a conference or discussion must fully prepare himself to discuss the concerned topic, irrelevant talk is of no use:ਨਾਨਕ ਆਏ ਸੇ ਪਰਵਾਣੁ ਹੈ ਜਿਨ ਹਰਿ ਵੁਠਾ ਚਿਤਿ ਗਾਲ੍ਹ੍ਹੀ ਅਲ ਪਲਾਲੀਆ ਕੰਮਿ ਨ ਆਵਹਿ ਮਿਤ ੫੩੨੦

Only those people are welcome who are clear in their mind about the subject; half-baked words do not help (M: 5, SGGS, p 320).

Participation should be balanced, because-ਮਸਟਿ ਕਰਉ ਮੂਰਖੁ ਜਗਿ ਕਹੀਆਅਧਿਕਬਕਉ ਤੇਰੀ ਲਿਵ ਰਹੀਆ ੧ ੧੩੦If one does not talk at all people may think he is ignorant but the essence may be lost if one talks too much (M: 1, SGGS, p 1330).

One sometimes finds to be losing in the discussion. It is then advisable to keep quiet:

ਜਿਥੈ ਬੋਲਣਿ ਹਾਰੀਐ ਤਿਥੈ ਚੰਗੀ ਚੁਪ੧੪੯If one does not have a winning argument it is better to keep quiet (M: 1, SGGS, p 149).

How to Make Friends.The fundamental requirements for friendship are mutual regard and lack of selfishness. The maxim ‘a fiend in need is a friend indeed’ sums the relationship well. We should foster lasting friendship, sharing both joys and tribulations. Gurbani tells us the type of friends to choose:

ਨਾਨਕ ਕਚੜਿਆ ਸਿਉ ਤੋੜਿ ਢੂਢਿ ਸਜਣ ਸੰਤ ਪਕਿਆ ਓਇ ਜੀਵੰਦੇ ਵਿਛੁੜਹਿ ਓਇ ਮੁਇਆ ਨ ਜਾਹੀ ਛੋੜਿ ੫ ੧੧੦੨O man, leave good-time friends; they will leave you when you need them most; seek the saintly true friends; they will not leave you even on death (M: 5, SGGS, p 1102).

The total creation is one brotherhood, children of one God. Belief in this helps promote friendship with all. God tells man:

ਆਪੁ ਸਵਾਰਹਿ ਮੈ ਮਿਲਹਿ ਮੈ ਮਿਲਿਆ ਸੁਖੁ ਹੋਇ

ਫਰੀਦਾ ਜੇ ਤੂ ਮੇਰਾ ਹੋਇ ਰਹਹਿ ਸਭੁ ਜਗੁ ਤੇਰਾ ਹੋਇ ੯੫ ਫ੧੧੮੨

If you reform yourself you will meet Me and be happy;

If you be Mine, the whole world will be yours (Farid, SGGS, p 1382).

Once we have this realization all feelings of of frinds and strangers, good and bad disappears leading to universal friendship:

ਨਿੰਦਉਨਾਹੀਕਾਹੂਬਾਤੈਏਹੁਖਸਮਕਾਕੀਆ

ਜਾਕਉਕ੍ਰਿਪਾਕਰੀਪ੍ਰਭਿਮੇਰੈਮਿਲਿਸਾਧਸੰਗਤਿਨਾਉਲੀਆ੫੬੧੧

This whole universe is created by the Master, do not slander any one; this is recognized through Divine grace in Sadh Sangat the holy congregation where God is praised (M: 5, SGGS, p 611).

To understand how man must reform himself it is useful to understand the type of faults we all suffer fromin this world. There are jealousies of many types – siblings, professional, success or failure, wealth, status and so on. Then there is an ego and ethical transgression. In this world of competition people tend to score at the cost of others. However in the long run a person’s ability to show results,and Divine grace, count. A person who has faith in this principle says:

ਤੂੰ ਕਰਤਾ ਸਚਿਆਰੁ ਮੈਡਾ ਸਾਂਈ

ਜੋ ਤਉ ਭਾਵੈ ਸੋਈ ਥੀਸੀ ਜੋ ਤੂੰ ਦੇਹਿ ਸੋਈ ਹਉ ਪਾਈ ਰਹਾਉ ੪੧੧

You are just my Master; what you approve happens;

I will get what I deserve and You give M: 4, SGGS, p 11).

This the spiritual interpretation but it equally applies to real- life situations because truth must ultimately prevail. This verse will then be interpreted thus:

The system is just: what is right happens; I will get what I deserve.

Jealousy being like fire causes a feeling of burn to the mind and should therefore be avoided:

ਪਰ ਕਾ ਬੁਰਾ ਨ ਰਾਖਹੁ ਚੀਤ ਤੁਮ ਕਉ ਦੁਖੁ ਨਹੀ ਭਾਈ ਮੀਤ

I you do not wish ill for others you will not suffer (M: 5, SGGS, p 386).

At times people try to harm others to gain undue advantage. It may work in the short run but eventually it harms the perpetrator. Many would have experienced that deception results in harm to self:

ਨਰ ਚਾਹਤ ਕਛੁ ਅਉਰ ਅਉਰੈ ਕੀ ਅਉਰੈ ਭਈ

ਚਿਤਵਤ ਰਹਿਓ ਠਗਉਰ ਨਾਨਕ ਫਾਸੀ ਗਲਿ ਪਰੀ ੩੮੯੧੪੨੮

Man makes schemes for something but the opposite happens; the noose awaits one who plans to deceive others (M: 9, SGGS, p 1428).

Universal friendship is possible if one sheds evil thoughts from the mind:

ਮਨ ਅਪੁਨੇ ਤੇ ਬੁਰਾ ਮਿਟਾਨਾ ਪੇਖੈ ਸਗਲ ਸ੍ਰਿਸਟਿ ਸਾਜਨਾ ੫੨੬੬

If evil is erased from the mind we look at the whole universe as friends (M: 5, SGGS, p 266).

And this friendship is reciprocated and ultimate bliss recieved:

ਸਭੁ ਕੋ ਮੀਤੁ ਹਮ ਆਪਨ ਕੀਨਾ ਹਮ ਸਭਨਾ ਕੇ ਸਾਜਨ ਦੂਰਿ ਪਰਾਇਓ ਮਨ ਕਾ ਬਿਰਹਾ ਤਾ ਮੇਲੁ ਕੀਓ ਮੇਰੈ ਰਾਜਨ

I have made every one my friend and am a friend of all; with the cause of separation in my mind removed I have been united with the Lord (M:3, SGGS, p 671).

When seeking friendship do so with people of matching intellectual caliber; that with either a person who is ignorant or too clever does not sustain:ਨਾਲਿਇਆਣੇਦੋਸਤੀਕਦੇਆਵੈਰਾਸਿਜੇਹਾਜਾਣੈਤੇਹੋਵਰਤੈਵੇਖਹੁਕੋਨਿਰਜਾਸਿ੪੭੪Friendship with an ignorant person can never be fruitful; he acts according to what he knows; one comes to this conclusion after experience (SGGS, p 474).

ਨਾਲਿਇਆਣੇਦੋਸਤੀਵਡਾਰੂਸਿਉਨੇਹੁਪਾਣੀਅੰਦਰਿਲੀਕਜਿਉਤਿਸਦਾਥਾਉਥੇਹੁ੪੭੪Friendship with an immature person or one of higher status; they do not last, like a line drawn on water does not last(SGGS, p 474).

Inter-personal behavior.

The principles stated for making friends are also applicable for good interpersonal relations. A few more points are worth remembering.

One should not blow one’s own trumpet to impress people. What we are will show in our conduct:

ਆਪਸ ਕਉ ਜੋ ਭਲਾ ਕਹਾਵੈਤਿਸਹਿਭਲਾਈਨਿਕਟਿ ਨ ਆਵੈ੨੭੮Goodness doe not come near a person who wants to be called good (M: 5, SGGS, p 278).

But it is also important to be discerning because some times people put up facades to hide their real self. For example they work hard and also show humility:ਅਪਰਾਧੀ ਦੂਣਾ ਨਿਵੈ ਜੋ ਹੰਤਾ ਮਿਰਗਾਹਿ ਸੀਸਿ ਨਿਵਾਇਐ ਕਿਆ ਥੀਐ ਜਾ ਰਿਦੈ ਕੁਸੁਧੇ ਜਾਹਿ ੧ ੪੭੦ What use is bowing down if the mind is evil? The way a hunter hides and stoops to shoot, (M: 1, SGGS, p 470).

An arrogant person cannot keep friends:ਨਾਨਕ ਫਿਕੈ ਬੋਲਿਐ ਤਨੁ ਮਨੁ ਫਿਕਾ ਹੋਇ ਫਿਕੋ ਫਿਕਾ ਸਦੀਐ ਫਿਕੇ ਫਿਕੀ ਸੋਇ ੧੪੭੩Arrogant talk makes the body and mind insipid;Such a person is called unpleasant and gets that reputation (M:, 1, SGGS, p 473).

We all have strengths and weaknesses. We should look at ourselves before we slander others:

ਫਰੀਦਾ ਜੇ ਤੂ ਅਕਲਿ ਲਤੀਫੁ ਕਾਲੇ ਲਿਖੁ ਨ ਲੇਖ ਆਪਨੜੇ ਗਿਰੀਵਾਨ ਮਹਿ ਸਿਰੁ ਨਂ‍ੀਵਾਂ ਕਰਿ ਦੇਖੁ ਫਰੀਦ ੧੩੭੮A wise person does not find faults with others;He looks withinhimself (Farid, SGGS, p 1378).

It is possible that at times one person is unable to agree with another. One does not then have to insult the other but should not get into argument with him:

ਮੰਦਾ ਕਿਸੈ ਨ ਆਖੀਐ ਪੜਿ ਅਖਰੁ ਏਹੋ ਬੁਝੀਐ ਮੂਰਖੈ ਨਾਲਿ ਨ ਲੁਝੀਐ ੧੯੧੪੭੩We should not call another person bad;remember not to engage a person you think is foolish

(M: 1, SGGS, p 473).

When two persons fall out, communication breaks. They do not talk to each other but others talk about them. The way to mend the situation is for one or both of them to talk nicely:

ਕਾਲਾ ਗੰਢੁ ਨਦੀਆ ਮੀਹ ਝੋਲ ਗੰਢੁ ਪਰੀਤੀ ਮਿਠੇ ਬੋਲ 1 143When there is draught it is remedied by plenty of rain in rivers;Similarly breach in love is repaired by sweet talk (M: 1, SGGS, p 143).

Humility is a very potent weapon. When other methods fail to win over others humility works. Of course it boils down to acknowledging one’s faults:ਗਰੀਬੀ ਗਦਾ ਹਮਾਰੀ ਖੰਨਾ ਸਗਲ ਰੇਨੁ ਛਾਰੀ ਇਸੁ ਆਗੈ ਕੋ ਨ ਟਿਕੈ ਵੇਕਾਰੀ ਗੁਰ ਪੂਰੇ ਏਹ ਗਲ ਸਾਰੀ ੫੬੨੮Humility is my mace, being the dust of others’ feet is my double edged sword;

No evil can withstand these; the perfect guru has given this understanding (M: 5, SGGS, p 628).

Personal Conduct.

ਜਿਤੁ ਕੀਤਾ ਪਾਈਐ ਆਪਣਾ ਸਾ ਘਾਲ ਬੁਰੀ ਕਿਉ ਘਾਲੀਐ ਮੰਦਾ ਮੂਲਿ ਨ ਕੀਚਈ ਦੇ ਲੰਮੀ ਨਦਰਿ ਨਿਹਾਲੀਐ ੧੪੭੪

When we know that consequences of our deeds have to be faced we should not do evil; Let us have farsightedness and not commit evil (M: 1, SGGS, p 474).

Deception is always exposed eventually. If someone tries to impress others bur have deceit in mind it will show up, so one should act honestly:ਜੋ ਜੀਇ ਹੋਇ ਸੁ ਉਗਵੈ ਮੁਹ ਕਾ ਕਹਿਆ ਵਾਉ ਬੀਜੇ ਬਿਖੁ ਮੰਗੈ ਅੰਮ੍ਰਿਤੁ ਵੇਖਹੁ ਏਹੁ ਨਿਆਉ ੨੪੭੪The spoken word of a person has little value; what is in mind shows up;People having a poisoned mind cannot expect peace (M: 2, SGGS, p 474).

Learning should not result in ego growth. Ego means the person thinks what he does is right. This leads to the five vices of lust, anger, and greed. Ego control leads to resistance to evil and prompts one to use knowledge for service of humanity:

ਵਿਦਿਆ ਵੀਚਾਰੀ ਤਾਂ ਪਰਉਪਕਾਰੀ ੧ ੩੫੬ One who contemplates on knowledge gained serves humanity (M: 1, SGGS, p 356).

One should not indulge in activities that result in waste of time and effort:

ਐਸਾਕੰਮੁਮੂਲੇਕੀਚੈਜਿਤੁਅੰਤਿਪਛੋਤਾਈਐ੯੧੮We should absolutely never do things for which we may have to repent (SGGS, p 918).

It is human nature to find scapegoats for own problems. It is the law of nature that he who sows reaps. The first Gurusays:ਦਦੈ ਦੋਸੁ ਨ ਦੇਊ ਕਿਸੈ ਦੋਸੁ ਕਰੰਮਾ ਆਪਣਿਆ ਜੋ ਮੈ ਕੀਆ ਸੋ ਮੈ ਪਾਇਆ ਦੋਸੁ ਨ ਦੀਜੈ ਅਵਰ ਜਨਾ ੨੧੪੩੩I cannot blame others formy woes;I am suffering the results of my deeds; I cannot blame others (M: 1, SGGS, p 433).

The above is only a cryptic description of how Gurbani guides in human resources development. As would have been seen the same attributes are needed for success on the spiritual and worldly paths.

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